I was at McDuffy's a few day's before Valentine's day this year with Stacy and Mory. We were bitching about work, and joking around and such as we often do. They had downed a few crappy beer's as they often do, and I was working on a Diet Coke.
Somehow the subject of Angela came up and how her and her girlfriend have a crappy relationship, and how her girlfriend seems borderline emotionally abusive. I thought it was kind of sad, and having no relationship is better than having a crappy one.
"I should send a dozen roses to her with a crappy love poem" I thought aloud. "I mean every girl, lesbian or straight likes flowers right? Besides, her and her girlfriend are probably just going to spend the day fighting." Miranda and Stacy thought the idea was great. We didn't discuss it much more that night, but I decided if I was going to do it, I was going to do it right.
So for the next couple of days I tried to think of the perfect poem, and searched online for a good place to get roses. Without too much effort I decided on a dozen long stem Ecuadorian roses with a matching vase.
The poem on the other hand was a bit tougher. Angela works with my mom, and has a girlfriend. I didn't want anyone to get in trouble for a silly joke on my part, so I decided not to put my name. I did want her to know who they were from so she didn't assume they were from her girlfriend though. I also wanted to express some interest without going overboard. I finally came up with the following:
Some women like diamonds
Some women like pearls
I wish you liked boys
Instead of girls
I saw you at Thanksgiving
I met you at the bar
If you were my Valentine
I wouldn't pout in the car
The day before Valentine's I went to the website, entered the poem, made all of the arrangements and after a moments hesitation and nervousness (Is it wrong to send a lesbian flowers?) clicked the submit button and it was done.
After this was done I called Miranda (My personal social barometer) to make sure I hadn't just made a big mistake.
"I did it"
"I sent the flowers and the crappy poem" (I then told her the poem)
"What the hell is your problem? You can't do that. You have to cancel it"
"I can't cancel, its the day before Valentine's. Besides, you said it was funny the other night!"
"I was drunk, of course it was funny you moron"
At this point I'm a little nervous. We call Stacy (Who works in the office) and let her know. She also says its probably not a good idea, but agrees to run interference to make sure its not taken the wrong way.
After all of the worrying, the flowers were more or less well received. Nothing really ever came of it, but at least I have a good story out of it.