I've been sick for the better part of two months now. First it was the ear infection from hell. That was followed shortly by a sinus infection. There's a solid chance that I'm dying, so if you're from that Make-A-Wish foundation please send a scantily clad, short, nerdy girl over to my house as soon as possible. Bonus points if she's in to short nerds, or gets a discount at zPizza.
One day the ear was so bad that I took the morning off from work and just slept in. I awoke at noon to find the phone all abuzz with work emails detailing various problems, and finally decided to haul my sorry ass in. The thing with being a software engineer is that when you're not around, it's all your fault.
Everything. Even in my weakened state, I wasn't going to stand for that, so I cleaned myself up, threw on a fresh set of clothes, and headed in to the office, prepared to kick some nerd ass.
As I rounded the last stairwell in the parking garage I heard a voice.
"Excuse me... um... excuse me?"
I hadn't seen anyone in the garage, so the voice took me by surprise. I searched around and eventually found a head hanging over from the floor above. This head happened to belong to a particularly cute girl and it was staring back at me.
"Um... could you jump me?"
Holy crap, am I still sleeping? Did I accidentally walk on to the set of a porno? I considered taking my pants off and doing my sexy time dance, but instead opted for something less.
"
Pardon?"
Normally I'd have put two and two together, but my brain still wasn't functioning yet. I stared back at her questioningly.
"My car... the battery is dead. I think I left dome light on."
Oh... of course...Minutes later I'd be helping her with her car and trying to awkwardly make small talk. It wasn't my usual D+ game, but I was sick so I'm giving myself a pass. Later in the month I would find out that the girl actually lives on my floor a few doors down.
While I haven't talked to the girl since, I like to think that we're just taking it slow. At our current pace, I fully expect to tell this story at our wedding in 2054. Save the date cards coming soon!
