After a few years of blogging, the list of names in my stories has gotten slightly out of hand. If you're a little confused, or want a slight rundown on who's who, then you're in the right place. Hopefully this will clear up some of the confusion that comes from my tendency to hand out nicknames like they're candy on Oct. 31.
Last update: July 5, 2010
Miranda - Alias: Mory, Murray
My younger sister. If you've never met Mory, just imagine me with blond hair and boobs and you get the idea. While I got the smarts in the family, she got looks and social ability. She's the "fun" one in the family.
Andrew - Alias: Anew
Miranda's baby daddy and soon to be husband. We kind of always picked Mory to end up with an ass. You can imagine our surprise when she wound up with exactly the opposite. Andrew is so nice that you sometimes think he's screwing with you. Honestly, I think he could do better, but don't tell Miranda I said that.
Josh - Alias: Joshua
My older brother. Looks wise, my complete opposite. He's big, burly, strong, manly. He's the take charge kind of guy who's going to get things done.
Anna - Alias: Player
Josh's wife. My sister in law. She's also possibly in love with me, but that's a blog for another time. Note the double n.(As compared to Ana)
Mom - Alias: Mother, Liz, Dizzy Lizzy
You guessed it, my mother. She'll tell you her slight craziness is due to her recent brain surgery, but don't believe it. She was always a little zany.
Dad - Alias: Big Guy, Mike
My dad's a decent guy. If you ever need to get anything done, and can't figure it out, he's got 3 different approaches to offer, and an excel spreadsheet to help you stay on schedule. He's an engineering manager though, so I can't think too highly of him.
Ruth - Alias: Ruthie, Little Ruthie, Little RuRu, E, The girl who put the Ru in RuRa
One of my two (ex)neighbors, and the leading cause of my impending mental breakdown. Individually, each of the twins is a force of nature that no sane man could possibly handle. Together, they're actually worse. To take a word from Kendall: Quite possibly the two most charming girls on the planet.
Rachel - Alias: Goob, Ray, L, The girl who put the Ra in RuRa
The crazier of the two if that's even possible. Rachel has got a potty mouth, and the attitude to match. It's scientifically impossible to be hanging out with Rachel and not have a big smile on your face. If you're having trouble figuring out which of the twins is which, Rachel is the one that just called you a bitch. Note the lack of a second a in her name(As opposed to Rac)
A friend of Ruth and Rachel's who has caught my attention with her knowlege in the ways of the nerd, quick wit, and astute sense of humor.
Maya - Alias: Maya Pearl
A friend who I met through Kendall that I've now commandeered, who also happens to be the lead singer of my on again off again fake Rock Band band, "Maya and the Pearls". Maya and I have one of the best, most normal relationships on the planet, which leads to her not showing up often in the blog. She also happens to be the lead singer of a real life band, "Awake and Alert". Do yourself a favor and check them out.
Geremy - Alias: Todd
A friend of my sister's who is teaching me how to treat a lady with class.
Erik - Alias: OG, OG Big E, Huge E, E Money
My best friend and rival in the "Worlds worst with women" competition. It should be noted that as of late he's been doing a better job with the ladies, which puts me in the lead.
Rose - Alias: RoRo, Rosie, Ro, Cranky Pants, The Doctor
One of my best friends in the whole world. If there's an awkward sitcom like situation in life, Rose and I have been through it together, argued, and then made up. A while back she left AZ and will soon be known as "Dr. Rose". Along the way she met her now husband Zach who, if she hadn't married, I might have.
Adam - Alias: O, The Odgeman, AO
Despite the fact that he's the one who introduced me to both Stacey and Rose, he's still one of my best friends in the world. I say "in the world" because he recently packed his bags and ran off to Germany. You'll never meet a man with a more odd yet perfect sense of humor and timing, or a deeper knowledge of the Suns.
Sean N - Alias: Needs
A work friend who shares both my ability to procrastinate, and desire to make fun of others. Also the non commissioned illustrator for both my office art, and this blog.
Sean L - Alias: Liang, Lang-a-tang, Baller, Pimp, Pimpin baller pimpin baller...
A sometimes member of the slacker group at work, and unfortunately for him most often the butt of the jokes. You'll never meet a whiter man who listens to 50 cent.
Dave - Alias Valley D, Vals D, Hippie
Every group of slackers needs a Shaggy, and he's ours. He can frequently be heard saying, "Awe man!"
J.R. - Alias: B, Baller, Hurley, Hurley McBaller
A friend of Sean N's who I've gotten to know. A forefather in ballerdom, and the inspiration for www.ballersusetide.com. He was also a star in the movie, "The Kingdom". You'll have to check his blog for more on that though.
Stacey - Alias: Pimpin, The Ace of Stace, Spanky, Phonics Monkey, etc...
A girl that I dated for six years. It took me an inordinate amount of time to get over her, but I think we can finally put that one in the "All Good" column. Note the e in her name. (As opposed to Stacy)
Ana - Alias: Chica, The Chilean Princess, Mi Amor
A girl I met in school. If there was a "Miss Computer Sci" pageant, this girl would win it, and they'd close the pageant for the next 60 years because there'd be no need to continue. I chased her for a solid three years before eventually giving up. Note the one n. (As opposed to Anna)
Angela - Alias: The Lesbian, Turbo Spaz 5000, TS5k
My mom's idea of a good set up.
A friend I met because he was the doorman at my building for a while. We don't keep in touch as much as we used to, which is sad because he was always a good source of gossip.
An old friend from High School and exceptional artist. I've known Laura for so long now that I can't completely remember how we met.
My Ninety-Something year old building crush. Imagine a redheaded Betty White and you get the idea.
A friend I met online, and my sometimes partner in crime. She's kind of tough as nails, and could probably beat you up despite being 5'2.
A nurse in Montana that I only know through the Internet. She's the author of the first blog I ever started regularly reading, and she ended up having a major impact on my life. Although we rarely talk, I'm quite certain in the year 2030 we're going to buy a duplex and have lots of zany adventures.
Rachael - Alias: Monkey
Mandi's sister, and my ex-girlfriend. Even though we only dated for a short time, she had a major impact on my life.
An ex-girlfriend who lives in Tucson.
Shaq - Alias: The Big Aristotle, MDE(Most Dominant Ever)
A kind of cool guy.
Steve - Alias: Nash, Nashty, #13, Canadian Jesus
I'm not a gay man, but I would probably date him given a chance.