Friday, November 21, 2008

Rant of the Day: Black Comedians

I was driving in to work today when it struck me. I just don't like Black comedy.

I'm not so narrow minded to say all Blacks are the same, but of the comedians that I could think of off the top of my head, they all shared some characteristics, most of which just don't appeal to me.

1. Angry - Everyone loves angry comedy, and I'm no exception. The "Rant of the Day" series was founded on that fact. For me this is a parody of angry comedy of sorts. As anyone who knows me will attest, aside from the cancellation of Arrested Development back in 2006, I haven't been angry in a decade.

The problem here is that the Blacks are angry, but not funny. They've got the build up, but no delivery. I'm always left waiting for that home run hit, and quite frankly it rarely, if ever, comes.

2. Cursing - The Blacks love to curse. It's one of the foundations of their comedic style. Again, so do I. But here's the deal. You can't throw sugar on a pile of turds and call it apple pie. The F word adds emphasis. It does not add funny. This is a common Black mistake.

3. The Let Down - I touched upon this in #1, but one of the biggest issues is the let down. For years I honestly thought that I loved Black comedy. One of them would come on the screen and I'd be the first to yell out, "Man, I love this guy. He does a rant about Starbucks that is hysterical." 5 minutes later I'd be thinking, "I remembered that bit being funnier."

4. Ego - The Blacks always think that they're the best. They're either the foremost commentator on everything, or some kind of wonderboy, but the Blacks always think they're the best. This ends up being a key point of their comedy. In most cases it's so far from the truth that it's not even funny.

Let's take a step back now, and look at two of the biggest Black comedians in the world today. I'm of course referring to Lewis and Jack.

Lewis I remember first seeing on Comedy Central's Daily Show and thinking, "Man, this guy is awesome. He's so angry. He's so observant." As years went by I finally realized that he was really just filler in between the Jon Stewart bits. He didn't even one up Kilborn, and that's just depressing in retrospect.

Here's an example of Lewis's comedic genius as he explains how to stimulate the economy(Use of the F word may make it not safe for work):

Jack on the other hand I first heard in a little band named, "Tenacious D". The concept was pretty simple. Take a few guys who'd never make it in rock and have them think that they're rock gods. Their first song "The Greatest Song in the World" was actually pretty solid. Unfortunately for Jack, it was all downhill from there.

In his last movie, "Tropic Thunder" Jack was out-funnied by Ben Stiller. That's like losing a marathon race to Heather Mills.


  1. you're a narrow minded bigot that i used to find moderately amusing but has since long ago dropped off the radar.

    please, no disrespect, but go hang yourself!

  2. God you are so racist against the Blacks. The Blacks are good people. I hate you so much after this post. Go S a D.

  3. I got a good laugh at your entry, and an even bigger laugh at the 39 comments I read elsewhere. Good stuff, man.

  4. Although I do agree that blacks can be disagreeable and you feign to have an open mind about blacks, your words intimate a deep seated bias against all blacks. Have you ever seen a black comedian in person – I think not. You did however take the time to see at least one white comedian - a couple of years back. What the hell did this white dude do but rant on about tater salad while smoking cigars and drinking scotch? Apparently you also hate Canadian because you forgot – or should I say ignored – Rob Black. Perhaps it was a half hearted attempt to prove you do not hate all blacks. Perhaps your man crush, on that other Canadian, prevented you from attacking Canadian blacks.